My eleventh entry and the last one before my first scheduled leave. After 3 months away I get a break and a long plane ride home. While I am getting more and more excited as the date draws near (I leave on the 27th at 1pm for a short flight to Bali), I would be fooling myself if I didn't mention that my excitement is tempered by some trepidation. While I would have thought such an emotion absurd only a few months ago, now that I have settled in and aclimatized myself to the environment, culture and liftstyle I question the validity of exposing myself to what will be merely a 'taste of home' that could cause me more grief than what its worth. Once again it is the little things that haunt me: how will I react to the temperature change; am I a right hand drive guy or a left; can I get more than 90 days of my prescription that I have recently run dry of. Then there are the more wieghty questions as I stand on the fence of two vastly different lifestyles and geographic locations - where do I belong? what if when I'm home I feel a little bit displaced? Is it possible to be a visitor in my own home? Whether these thoughts have merit I don't know but they dog me all the same. Like many stories the end holds the curiosity before the departure even begins! This coupled with the fact that people tell me that the first leave is the most difficult, especially when you arrive back in Dili as it is wieghs on you what you left and where you have come back too. Stay tuned for my reaction upon my return back to this tropical wonderland on April 21.
On the flip side this trip abounds with lots of good things that I really look forward to: visiting places I have never been (Bali and Hong Kong), using a credit card again, and having a really good meal. While I may complain about the flights I am in reality a bit of a airline buff and look forward to spending time in Hong Kong Airport which was just built on a man-made island a few years ago and spending time in the airport lounges watching planes as I wait for my flight. It is the 13 hours in a metal tube a few kms in the sky that is not so palatable. Think of it as 6 movies, back to back (2hrs each) with an hour left over to settle in, have a meal, and a few bathroom breaks and you get the idea. Most important of all though is catching up with family and friends which I have missed so much. After being away for so long you start to feal disconnected with everything that is going on and I won't be there long enough to reconnect. When I came here in January I diliberately tried not to think to much of those important to me in order to make the transition a little easier, in large part it worked. However as I get closer and closer to my departure these types of emotions come to my mind more frequently. Will it be that much harder when I leave again?
All interesting thoughts that I will only be able to evaluate upon my return back to Dili. On the bright side of returning I can already see the weather migrating towards the dry season. The afternoon clouds that always roll in by mid afternoon aren't as reliable, and the hills are looking more parched than they did even a week ago. Everyone reminds me that in this region of the world, so close to the equator, that seasons are not winter and summer but wet and dry. Good thing as I can't get my head around the fact that we are coming into winter, not the summer as I am use to back home.
The other bonus, and one which wieghed in my decision to say yes to Timor, is that I can exploit most if not all of the vacation days (30) that I am allotted. In my previous job at Mother Hydro my holidays were always so much of a hassle as we were at the whim of the PUB and some regulatory requirment that restricted holidays. In addition I guess I felt to attached to my job in that I would let it dictate my vacation schedule vs. the other way around. Everyone in regulatory shares the same story: the work is good but the holidays suck. Like in the financial world you know that right after the fiscal year end the next 2 months is not good, or teachers that know holidays are Christmas, Easter and the summer. In the regulatory world either your embroiled with the regulator or preparing documents for the regulator. Despite these complaints I do miss the work.
Not to spend to much time on the infamous gash in my head I must relate one of the intimacies of medicine here in Dili. Again, using the resources of my trusty Zenilido who called the hospital to schedule a visit to have the sutures removed I again found myself in the same examination room I was the last two times. This time I didn't get the exam table but instead a plastic garden chair. I had to share the room with this poor little girl who must have been 4 or 5 who was on the exam table crying and clutching her worn out, dirty teddy bear as she was having her lip sewn up what I assumed to be a nasty fall of her own. I felt so bad for her and she was obviously terrified of the experience. The intimacy comes in the form of help that is around, again Zenilido came with me to watch the extraction, and while the guy tried to cut the sutures with a pair of sissors with no success by yanking on my skin they decided instead to try a scapel blade. As the nurse already had his rubber gloves on he pointed Zenildo to the cabinet to extract the proper blade - and forget mounting it in a holder - nope - just grip it and start swiping. Thankfully I got the blue line out without any further damage.
That's it - a short and sweet post as I prepare to depart homeward for the first time. Next time I'll be in a time zone near you!
High above the ground as you jet through the sky
From one world to another in a blink of the eye.
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